5
How we sound vs how we do not
+10
Every weak line below is followed by why it is weak and the CUN rewrite. Read BAD, then RIGHT, out loud, back to back.
1) SUGGESTIVE SELL
BAD: 'Would you care to try our fries today?'
WHY BAD: Stiff, robotic, sounds like a customer-service script. Zero personal stake, easy to say no.
RIGHT: 'Hell yeah, sexy fries are one of our signatures, you have to get them.' Energy, confidence, you are vouching for it.
2) NEW GUEST
BAD: 'Are you familiar with our menu?'
WHY BAD: Sounds like a quiz. Puts the guest on the spot and can embarrass them if they say no.
RIGHT: 'First time? Cool, you are good, I got you.' Casual, warm, lowers the stakes and hands them a guide.
3) BEVERAGE ADD-ON
BAD: 'Would you like to add a beverage to your order?'
WHY BAD: Generic, sterile, no reason to say yes. Easy no.
RIGHT: 'Mango lassi or a chai with that? My favorite is the lassi, it cools the heat.' Specific choice, personal pick, ties to the food.
4) DISH RECOMMENDATION
BAD: 'Would you recommend the deconstructed samosa?'
WHY BAD: Sounds like the cashier does not know their own menu. Kills trust.
RIGHT: 'Decon samosa is AK's thing, he eats it desi hot.' Brand story baked in, sounds like an insider tip.
5) SERVICE RECOVERY
BAD: 'I can offer you a complimentary item to compensate for the inconvenience.'
WHY BAD: Corporate apology, lawyer-speak. Feels like a policy, not a person.
RIGHT: 'Let me get you something better, on us.' Ownership in five words, no script energy.
GUT CHECK: If your line sounds like a chain restaurant or a customer service department, rewrite it. CUN sounds like a friend who works here, not a script.